This Southern Faggot's Blog

hair hair hair
November 13, 2009, 1:28 am
Filed under: Nothing Terribly Important, What is this shit? | Tags:

For a lot of my life, I have had long hair. I mean, I had a bowl cut for a long time, which I guess is long.

I  used to have a name for my bowl cut that wasn’t “bowl cut”. I think kids I knew called it a skater cut, or something like that. Looking back, I don’t even know what that means.

Anyway. For a lot of my life I had long hair, but I have never considered myself to be someone with long hair. I don’t think about my hair currently and think about it being long, I just think about it being cute. Which I think it is. I guess.

Anyway. I see pictures of me that are taken from behind and my immediate response is almost “Who the fuck is that long haired fuck”. It always takes me a long time to realize that is actually what I look like from behind. I have long hair. People look at the back of my head and all they know is that I. Have. Long. Hair.

This is really strange to me. I wish the front could look like the back. You know, cute and choppy. I guess that is possible. Maybe from the front it looks just as tragic as it does in the back. And maybe the back isn’t really that tragic, it’s just tragically boring. I need something happening back there. I mean, I like the length, but I need something, you know, maybe like something that moves.

Maybe I could get a little plastic doll that sat in my hair and waved at people. Maybe it could have a little umbrella that it spun while I whistled a tune.

Wait. I can’t whistle. Never in my life have I been able to whistle on purpose. Sometimes on accident, like a really tragic lisp, but instead a whistle. But only sometimes. Because it only happens sometimes, it always catches me off guard. I hope I don’t look visibly confused and/or frightened when it happens.

Anyway. My hair is long in the back and in the front. End of the story.


1 Comment so far
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I love this post. All of it, but especially the little plastic doll that will sit in your hair and wave at people.

Comment by Jo

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