This Southern Faggot's Blog

The distance
February 24, 2011, 6:14 am
Filed under: New projects, People to remember, Projects | Tags: , ,

Sometimes the physical distance that I have from the handful of Queers that I love in the world is empowering. Sometimes I don’t think about the physical distance and how great it actually is. And how those lines and borders that exist between you and me change and how people and cultures change across those borders.And I don’t mean borders between countries, but simply between states. I mean, countries too, but specifically, states.

Sometimes that distance is fine and I am able to still feel connected to those handful of Queers who I love. But sometimes the distance is really oppressive and sits on my shoulder all day, ever day.

Recently that distance has been more of the not so great part.

I think that this always happens to me, every year around this same time, but I always forget. I mean, anyone who knows me knows that I have this problem of idealizing my summer time. And I never make any solid plans, so then all these awesome plans don’t really ever have any chance of getting off the ground.

But how can I fix that? I mean, aside from just setting specific dates and making myself leave on those dates. I am always really jealous of people who can just travel around and never really seem to make any sort of schedule. Is their a secret into doing that, or do I just not have the ability to make that feel right for myself?

I got offered this job at this theater in this tiny town in Texas, but I ended up turning it down. I was not really that interested in the job, but it just felt so wrong, saying so early that yes, I will give up my summer to work for you.

I have never really thought of doing any other sort of work during the summer, my default has always been doing something in a theater. But maybe I need to look at seasonal farm work. Somewhere local would be nice.

But maybe I also need help realizing that just because I enjoy doing something for myself, does not mean I would enjoy doing it for other people. Like cleaning the house, or cooking or gardening. Maybe these are things I just need to keep to my self, other than Food Not Bombs.

But maybe all of those country songs about going off for seasonal farm work and falling in love with the farmers daughter. Maybe that could be ME! Right?

Anyway, back to summer plans. Places I need to visit:

Houston, NOLA, Athens (GA), Crossett (AR), Branson (MO) (My roomate just got an AARP membership, for some reason), Birmingham and Austin.

I need to start wheat pasting again, because I am constantly thinking about how much I miss wheat paste projects. I would love to go down and work with No More Deaths for a while and finish my still and book scanner.

That list seems manageable. I think I can do this. Of course working on my garden is in there too, but that is a given.


1 Comment so far
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I would suggest be more proactive in getting names and addresses and meeting up with people to get to know them.

Comment by Jacob Woods

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