Oh yea. Everyones favorite breaking news story, Clint McCance resigned!
But he is unopposed on the ballot coming up this Tuesday. Don’t you love it when democracy works so well!
Oh.. wait…
Filed under: New projects, Thinking Thinking | Tags: homelessness, queer and trans resources
Today! What a good today was!
I have not seen these 2 friends in fucking forever, but today I went over to the organization that they work with/for/run and it was really refreshing. I have not seen the two of then since the 3 of us were sitting on a board for this typical liberal ‘LGBT org’, which was a disaster. We got to gossip, which is always wonderful, but we also got to bounce ideas off each other for projects.
They don’t want to be working on legislative shit, but are interested in homelessness, HIV/AIDS, sexual health and syringe exchanges. I knew all of this already, but it was really good for me to hear that people were still interested in working on projects that are actually interesting and necessary.
Granted, past conversations like this, with people in this town, follow quickly with disappointment. But something about them seems different.
They just lost most of their funding, are super pissed off and are starting to see the limitations of the non-profit world, I think. Which is really refreshing.
We briefly talked about Against Equality and they seemed very interested. Maybe somehow they will get some money to bring the shining faces of the AE folks down here.
I didn’t realize how much I needed this, until I was leaving the church and i was almost giddy with excitement. At this point, I don’t care if these conversations go no where. Just being able to talk to someone, face to face, in person, who is as excited as I am about the idea of projects, is nice.
I feel like I should say something about this whole Clint McCance thing. I mean, sure it is upsetting. Clearly. But I hate it when groups like HRC only give a shit about the South when they have some interesting story to report on. It seems like across the board, people refuse to talk about the South, unless they have something negative to say and then it makes national fucking media.
Sure, Clint fucked up and made the mistake of thinking Facebook wasn’t a public forum. But his thoughts and opinions are not breaking news or anything new. Sure, it feels good for a little bit to be able to point out this one specific incident and wave your little finger, but this news coverage isn’t helping any kids in the South. HRC isn’t going to send down a million dollars to build a shelter, kids parents eyes are not going to be opened to new injustices all around them. Kids, teachers, principals and everyone else in schools (especially in small towns) who pay attention to their surroundings are saying “Duh.”
I don’t really have many thoughts pulled together about this, I don’t think. I wish I could be more hopeful and think that this won’t just blow over in a couple of weeks. I wish I could believe that something better will come from this, but I don’t. If anything, it will just make people keep their opinions to themselves more, which is even more dangerous because you don’t know who to trust.
Speaking of this weather, my roomate and I just got back from a backpacking trip.
The area we were hiking in was really rocky, you will probably notice that
This is where we stayed the first night
This is where we stayed the first night. Looks a whole lot like the first place we stayed, but it is different, I promise.
On the way home, we stopped by a petting zoo. They had a cow.
Filed under: Projects, The new hose, Thinking Thinking, Those moments, Tricks turned lessons learned | Tags: new projects, turning tricks, winter is coming
I love everything about tonight. I have so much energy, but where did it come from?
I had energy to go to a show. Kind of a house show, but not really in a house. To deal with drunk faggots. You know the ones. After introductions they ask “no really, what’s your name?” or, you can tell (honey, you can ALWAYS tell) that they don’t want to talk to you anymore because they think you started the conversation off by lieing to them, just by telling them your name.
I left the show early and told people that I needed to go to bed, but that was a lie. This time I really was lieing. Something didn’t feel right. Somehow it felt like a safe space of mine was invaded by people who made it very un-safe. But I don’t know why I would feel like this. I have only been in this house once.
On my ride home, I realized that it was one of THOSE nights that I love. The nights early in fall/winter that cause your eyes to fog up when you are riding your bike. I love seeing the world through a layer of fog, everything looks wonderful.
Less dangerous, maybe.
It is one of those nights early in the fall/winter where I am constantly shivering. I don’t have any shoes or pants, because I turned last years winter pants into this years summer shorts. But now it is getting close to being this winter and I don’t have anything to keep the lower half of my body warm. I need to find my tights.
This time of year reminds me of turning tricks. It reminds me of how tricks houses always feel so terribly hot and uncomfortable, because they actually use their heaters. I imagine they crank the heat up before I get there, because you do that for company.
But then I sweat. Everywhere.
I haven’t turned a trick in a terribly long time. I think about it a whole lot, especially recently. I don’t open up to anyone anymore, so maybe it would feel so natural.
I find myself talking to people I know, like they are tricks. You know, keeping conversations going really well, but also constantly steering it where you want it to go. Nothing too personal, nothing too in depth, nothing that would require too much energy.
Never letting the conversation get too close, but never letting anyone know.
If I am doing this all the time anyway, maybe I should go ahead and start getting paid for it again. I have a bunch of projects in my head that I would love to have funds for, what could be better?
Some days it feels good to eat a jalapeño, sit down in the garden and wait for the pain to go away.
Today is one of those days.
Filed under: Nothing Terribly Important | Tags: game music, games I might not ever play, Minecraft
The entire internet (and most people I know) are currently obsessed with this game called Minecraft. It’s not really my thing, BUT, the music, this music, is absolultly amazing.
I might actually get around to playing Minecraft, at some point, even though sandbox games are not really exciting for me. But, I can appreciate that each level is randomly generated and is 8 times the size of Earth.. isn’t that neat!
Filed under: lessons learned, People to remember, Tricks turned lessons learned | Tags: a beer!, making out
I found this beer in my attic. I put it in the fridge a long time ago and decided to drink it tonight. This has been my first beer in forever.
The bitterness, the wonderful awfulness. Everything about it brings back so many memories. All of them good, somehow.
Mostly I am remembering the times when I had this same taste in my mouth and making out with someone. But you know, really sloppy making out. The kind where your whole face ends up wet after and everything smells like dried beer spit, but at the time that is the most wonderful smell in the world and all you want to do is smell that smell for the rest of your life.
Oh wait, now I am just thinking about how I can not remember the last time I made out with someone who was not a trick. I guess it has been more than a year at this point, which is really weird to think about.
I need to find someone to make out with me.
Oh yea. Also, I am going hiking with my room mate and parents dog. I am super, super excited about leaving town to be nowhere/somewhere.
I would love to spend more time exploring the Southerness around me. A pilgrimage of sorts, possibly. I mean, maybe that is what it would be.
Anyway, I want to see more and more, because I am constantly amazed by the things just in my back yard. You know, really honest people, squrrels, amazing trees and tree tunnels. Yes, tree tunnels, my favorite!
I have thought a lot about this over the past few years. Not about if I want to do it or not, clearly I do. More, how it would be structured. I feel like I would need some sort of goal, or attraction to try to see in little towns. Maybe attraction makes them sound more spectacular than they might be. But, I mean, I would need something to do. Clearly walking around and looking at stuff is something, but that can not possibly be everything.
For a long time of my life, when I spent 4+ hours at the Waffle House, every day for a year or so, I wanted to visit Waffle Houses. I always thought that would work, cause I know they are everywhere and they are somewhat safe. In that, I know that I can always get a coffee and pretend the hash browns are vegan. I guess I would need to think about food more, because I could not possibly live off coffee and hash browns… All my TSF posts would just be about awful bathroom experiences!
I need to think about this more.
This Southern Faggot's Blog 
